Our son was diagnosed with a severe peanut allergy when he was 13 months old. A terrible way to discover this: I gave him peanut butter on toast and within seconds his lips had swollen, he had hives all over his face and had developed breathing difficulties. A skin prick test with a well known allergist 4 days later confirmed the allergy.
Life has changed a lot since then. An Epi Pen is our constant companion. I read labels religiously and have wherever possible excluded nut products from the house. The 'contains traces of nuts' subject is a whole other ball game and one we juggle on a day to day basis. Calls to companies and inquisitorial questions are the norm to determine 'risk' and satisfy maternal desire to protect my son as much as possible.
Recently moved my son to one full day of long day care (he's been doing Family Day Care for ages and with the support of our Family Day Care mum, it's been incident free thus far). After discussing my son's allergy with staff well before he commenced care, raiding the cook's pantry, identifying suitable and non suitable food on the long day care menu, on the first day, I kissed my son goodbye and held my breath for most of the day. This has been a huge leap of faith. The day care centre has been blown away by my commitment to share knowledge and assist them by identifying food in their pantry that is – to the best of my knowledge and research – suitable for my son. They were even more impressed that I sent my son along on his first day wearing a 'no nuts' t-shirt and instructions that I was happy for him to sit apart from the other children during meal times.
He's not being 'segregated' – I'm being cautious until such time as he is able to articulate his needs himself (he's just turned two).
He most definitely is being labelled in the best possible way, again, until such time that he can speak for himself. Visual reminders are essential if your child is not in your care for any period of time.
Sure, spontaneity is a thing of the past, although, thankfully (I never thought I'd say this!) we have a recently opened McDonalds nearby which means we can have the occasional take away with minimal stress.
Ours is an ongoing story, a constant learning curve and daily challenge. It's certainly not without its frustrations and irritations! Luckily, our household motto is 'there is nothing constant but change' (thanks Heraclitus!). My role in all of this is to tell anyone and everyone who will listen about our son's allergy and educate to the best of my ability those involved in his care. Some people are happy to hear and help, others take time to come on board.
I'm a member of Anaphylaxis Australia Inc and I purchase Star Allergy Alert products to assist us. Sure, we've had (and will continue to have) occasions where interactions with others in the public sphere (eg: hospitals) have lead to despair and disbelief at the lack of knowledge and understanding of what we live with, but by and large, the response from most people is overwhelmingly positive. I find most are relieved when you provide them with the knowledge and information they need to understand and help where they can.
It's about building capacity: my son's, our family's and the community's.
Catherine Watts
Hi There Catherine, congratulations on maintaining a "normal lifestyle" for your little boy, you are streets ahead of myself in the "faith" stakes! My 17 month old is at risk of anaphylaxis with dairy, egg, tree nut and seafood, & has mild allergies ( by comparison!) to potato. Salycilates & preservatives are also a huge problem so we ( or im ) still on struggle street for most of the time! thank you for sharing your story, it really does give me hope that we can all over come these terrible afflictions and live the best and safest way possible for our children and our extended families involved, because as you know we are all inextricably linked when it comes to trying to live allergen free. Sharing the load is essential
ReplyDeletethanks again
Jo
Hello Catherine
ReplyDeleteWe live in British Columbia, Canada, and I could have written the first paragraph of your story. My son who is now 6, as been severely allergic to peanuts since 12 months.
I understand the constant reminders at the grocery stores and reading label after label after label.
When you said that you "held your breath" for your son's first day of child care....I understand!!!!! Sending my son to Kindergarten was probably the hardest thing I have had to do. Trusting my son to remember not to share food, trusting the teacher to remember not to hand out the innocent looking cupcake that a mom had broght in to celebrate a birthday, trusting the school to keep my son safe. It has been hard for me, but so far there have been no incidences for us. I covered my son's water bottle, lunch bag and back pack in "No nuts for me" stickers and buttons so that everyone, can remember that my son is allergic to peanuts.
Our school has a "no peanuts" policy to help keep my son safe. A teacher helper will check lunches in my son's class and anyone who has a "questionable" snack eats their snack at a different table. So my son is able to be part of the classroom, he is not made to feel different. I really appreciate this.
Thank you for sharing your story. I appreciate great products like Star Allergy Alerts, even half way around the globe.
sincerely, Sandra